Missing: Brain. Reward Offered
Jun. 12th, 2010 06:10 pmI spent a couple days up in Lewisville with the runt. We didn't do too much, just mostly hung out. He's out of school and has no job at the moment, so his schedule was wide open. Mostly it was going out to eat and video games. It was fun to hang out with him; I should've done it earlier this week. We watched "The A-Team," which had ridiculous action, but exceeded my non-existent expectations.
Today though, has been a fiasco from the start. I go back to Canada tomorrow so I left Lewisville at the crack of dawn to get back to Austin so that I'd have all day to get packed and otherwise organized. When I got back to Austin I noticed that I had a new voicemail on my home phone from Cameron. I wondered, "Why'd he call? To say goodbye or something?" The message: Hey Cody, you forgot your laptop up here.
Aw fucknuts.
I had the laptop power adapter and it's wireless mouse with me in the truck; how had I forgotten the laptop itself? So mere minutes after returning to Austin, I got back in my truck and turned right around back to Dallas. The entire drive back I was kicking myself in the ass. God I swear I am so freaking absent-minded. I don't know what it is. ADD? There's a hole in my brain big enough to sail an aircraft carrier through. All the gingko-biloba and mnemonics in the world won't patch up that hole. Like this weekend, Cameron, Katherine, and I went to this fancy Italian restaurant up there. Something called Mangio's or Mannioto's--I don't know. But it was fancy. Split-level dining room, everything is built out of wood, chandeliers on the ceiling, candles on the tables, etc. I'm like, Wow. Fancy. Good thing I didn't wear jeans today. Sometime during the meal I excuse myself to go to the bathroom. I go in there and notice that . . . all of the toilets are stalls.
At this point a normal human brain would have spoken up: Hey Cody, you're in the ladies' room. Get out quick. But not my brain. Mine's got wires crossed or something. Honestly, my thought process was this: . . . Hmm . . . No urinals. . . . Well, this IS a pretty fancy Italian restaurant. I guess over there in Europe, urinals might be considered tacky or vulgar. Stalls are more discrete, I guess. Hm. This is a pretty classy place. They're really European here." So I go do my business, convinced this is normal. Five minutes later I'm washing my hands that a woman comes in the door behind me. Our eyes meet in the mirror (I don't know which one of us was more confused) and THAT'S when I realize I'm in the ladies room. Honestly, I think there's something wrong with my brain.
So I drove back to Dallas, got my laptop, and turned around again. Instead of 3 hours of driving today, I spent 10. Weeee. On the way back I stopped at the Schlotzsky's in Hillsboro for a late lunch. I was displeased to see that they've discontinued my favorite sandwich, but whatever, they're all pretty similar. While eating my sandwich, I bit my lip, with my canine, hard. I jumped an inch out of my chair. My lip is bleeding, that's how deep of a gouge it is. I keep eating . . . and bite myself again. SAME SPOT. I jerk like someone zapped me. God that hurt. Now every time I take a bite of my sandwich, I leave a spot of blood on the bun. The rim of my cup has blood on it. By now my lip's getting a bit swollen where I bit it, so I try to be more . . . mindful of how I'm chewing. But apparently I was over-thinking it because, BAM! I bit myself a third time in the same damn spot. It hurts worse every time! I jumped up again and nearly cursed out loud. I managed to finish eating my metallic-tasting sandwich without further injuring myself. I move on to my chips. The usual. . . . Salt & Vinegar. Normally they're not a problem. Then again, normally I can safely feed myself. One salt-encrusted, vinegar-soaked chip touched my open wound and LIT IT UP. That brought tears to my eyes but since my mouth was full of food, my cry of pain came out only as a moo of pain. That was it. I gave up.
Today has not been my day. I'd prefer to savor my last night here in civilization, but I think it would be wiser to stay home where it's safe (I hope).
Today though, has been a fiasco from the start. I go back to Canada tomorrow so I left Lewisville at the crack of dawn to get back to Austin so that I'd have all day to get packed and otherwise organized. When I got back to Austin I noticed that I had a new voicemail on my home phone from Cameron. I wondered, "Why'd he call? To say goodbye or something?" The message: Hey Cody, you forgot your laptop up here.
Aw fucknuts.
I had the laptop power adapter and it's wireless mouse with me in the truck; how had I forgotten the laptop itself? So mere minutes after returning to Austin, I got back in my truck and turned right around back to Dallas. The entire drive back I was kicking myself in the ass. God I swear I am so freaking absent-minded. I don't know what it is. ADD? There's a hole in my brain big enough to sail an aircraft carrier through. All the gingko-biloba and mnemonics in the world won't patch up that hole. Like this weekend, Cameron, Katherine, and I went to this fancy Italian restaurant up there. Something called Mangio's or Mannioto's--I don't know. But it was fancy. Split-level dining room, everything is built out of wood, chandeliers on the ceiling, candles on the tables, etc. I'm like, Wow. Fancy. Good thing I didn't wear jeans today. Sometime during the meal I excuse myself to go to the bathroom. I go in there and notice that . . . all of the toilets are stalls.
At this point a normal human brain would have spoken up: Hey Cody, you're in the ladies' room. Get out quick. But not my brain. Mine's got wires crossed or something. Honestly, my thought process was this: . . . Hmm . . . No urinals. . . . Well, this IS a pretty fancy Italian restaurant. I guess over there in Europe, urinals might be considered tacky or vulgar. Stalls are more discrete, I guess. Hm. This is a pretty classy place. They're really European here." So I go do my business, convinced this is normal. Five minutes later I'm washing my hands that a woman comes in the door behind me. Our eyes meet in the mirror (I don't know which one of us was more confused) and THAT'S when I realize I'm in the ladies room. Honestly, I think there's something wrong with my brain.
So I drove back to Dallas, got my laptop, and turned around again. Instead of 3 hours of driving today, I spent 10. Weeee. On the way back I stopped at the Schlotzsky's in Hillsboro for a late lunch. I was displeased to see that they've discontinued my favorite sandwich, but whatever, they're all pretty similar. While eating my sandwich, I bit my lip, with my canine, hard. I jumped an inch out of my chair. My lip is bleeding, that's how deep of a gouge it is. I keep eating . . . and bite myself again. SAME SPOT. I jerk like someone zapped me. God that hurt. Now every time I take a bite of my sandwich, I leave a spot of blood on the bun. The rim of my cup has blood on it. By now my lip's getting a bit swollen where I bit it, so I try to be more . . . mindful of how I'm chewing. But apparently I was over-thinking it because, BAM! I bit myself a third time in the same damn spot. It hurts worse every time! I jumped up again and nearly cursed out loud. I managed to finish eating my metallic-tasting sandwich without further injuring myself. I move on to my chips. The usual. . . . Salt & Vinegar. Normally they're not a problem. Then again, normally I can safely feed myself. One salt-encrusted, vinegar-soaked chip touched my open wound and LIT IT UP. That brought tears to my eyes but since my mouth was full of food, my cry of pain came out only as a moo of pain. That was it. I gave up.
Today has not been my day. I'd prefer to savor my last night here in civilization, but I think it would be wiser to stay home where it's safe (I hope).